Article - What's in a Name?

WHAT’S IN A NAME?

I was born at a very early age - two, in fact - it was an elderly stork and the wind was against it… That was at 2am on a snowy Christmas Day in 1949. Mum and dad couldn’t decide whether to call me Noel or Nicholas. They plumped for the good bishop of Myra, Saint Nicolas, Santa Claus. My big sister is curiously called Santa, apparently after an aunty Santa Verdi. And I had a member of my church in Torquay born exactly 50 years before me whose name was Yule. So I should be grateful I wasn’t called Mistletoe, or even Turkey…

Do you remember how Sir Gareth of Orkney (son of King Lot) came to King Arthur’s court and wouldn’t tell anyone who he was or what his name was? He worked in the kitchens for a year and got the sarcastic nickname ‘Beaumaines’ - ‘Beautiful Hands’. Then he went on Great Quests and Did Exploits to prove his suitability to be a Knight of the Round Table. (It’s all in Malory’s King Arthur). Only then, when he had earned his name, would he tell the Court his real name and that he was a prince.

For mere mortals, the name is not necessarily the destiny (Nicholas means ‘leader’ and I’m still only Assistant Principal!) But God’s human name and human destiny were one and the same. The name of Mary’s Son was to be the most significant name in history. “And you shall call his name Jesus (‘Salvation’) for he will save his people from their sins.”

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Penny for the Guy

PENNY FOR THE GUY

As a boy, I was always fascinated with explosives. So October/November was a good time for me but a dangerous time for my friends.

I would buy fireworks, take them apart, add a few iron-filings, copper shavings, sugar, weed-killer; and make small thermonuclear devices that could destroy rabbit hutches; or create guns that shot 6-inch nails clean through neighbours' garden sheds. My rockets were spectacular - whenever I could get them to go 'up' rather than 'along'. Other children in our back alley knew better than to hang around after Nicky had lit the blue touch paper. It is a miracle that I still have all my extremities intact.

I suppose that given the chance (as I was in Texas recently with some Vietnam War Veterans) most men will jump at the opportunity to shoot guns and blow up things. (Sadly, there's often not a lot more behind some of the atrocities that go on in our world in the name of nationalist principles…) I learnt to sew and knit in those boyhood years, but it was pyrotechnics, weapons and fighting that absorbed much of my play.

Guy Fawkes, a good Catholic boy, expressed his religious toleration by trying to blow up the House of Commons in session. His Protestant judges meted out justice by publicly burning him, and urging us all to "Remember, remember the 5th of November…" Next time you give a 'penny for the guy' shoot up a prayer for religious toleration in our deeply divided world.

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Home Brewing

HOME BREWING

That’s the trouble with making really good wine. You end up drinking far more of it than you normally would, and enthusiastically uncork a bottle of your finest “Chateau Boots 1992 (August)” at the merest excuse for a celebration: Trafalgar Day (Oct 21st); Andy has changed his sheets and it’s not even half-term; a broken engagement; it’s Friday…

I made some Elderflower Cordial in the summer but the white wine vinegar must have set off a fermentation and it has ended up as a rather lethal Elderflower Champagne.

So I thought I’d go back to my working class roots and make beer instead. It hangs on the back of my lounge door in a distended polythene bladder, which dispenses frothy, cloudy, malty, lukewarm ale. It’s so strong that I have to water it down, and the enormous pressure the gases produce makes me fear an industrial accident. Imagine the headline: “Bible College Students in Exploding Still Debacle!”

Jesus spoke about the new wine of the kingdom exploding out of old wineskins - the religious constraints of his day - and the church has constantly struggled with Jesus’ twin demands to take up our cross, and to live life to the full. It is an embarrassment to some over-pious Christians that Jesus’ very first miracle was helping his mum out at a wedding party, where he turned 150 gallons of water into wine. The church has been trying to turn it back into water ever since. That’s the trouble with making really good wine.

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Back to School

Back To School

I hated school milk - those little third of a pint bottles, always lukewarm, but apparently ‘good for us’ all in the 1950’s. But I soon wised up. I used to get Anthony to drink it when Miss wasn’t looking, or else get Pauline to knock it over.

Nonetheless, I always loved school. Talking to friends, I think generally boys enjoyed school more than girls. Now that may reflect the sexist view of education still prevalent in the 50’s and 60’s. Why educate girls when they were only going to become wives and mothers?

Or it may be that schools pander to that male instinct to hunt with the pack; to be one of the lads; to jostle for position in the petty hierarchies of the classroom - form captain, class villain, milk monitor, flunky to the villain, teachers pet, best friend of the soccer star, boy who can wiggle his ears independently…

Probably I liked school because I had great teachers - many of them fine Christians. Is it just my rose-tinted memory that thinks that many more teachers used to be wise as well as knowledgeable?

One of the 70’s Christian singers, Larry Norman, put it this way: “You can go to your college, you can go to your school, but if you aint got Jesus, you’s an educated fool.”

Or if you prefer Orlando Gibbons, the seventeenth century writer of The Silver Swan: “More geese than swans now live, more fools than wise.”

Who will teach this generation Wisdom?

Woman Alive monthy column

Article - Caveat Emptor

Caveat Emptor
(Let the Buyer Beware!)

You must have noticed that things in catalogues never look quite the same when they arrive. I buy mainly underpants from catalogues; not because I want them or need them. It’s simply that, in order to get the free gift when you become a catalogue agent, you have to send in your first order. My first and only order is always the cheapest possible pack of underpants. I have accumulated a number of phones, hair-driers and chip pans this way - but it leaves you with the problem of an enormous pile of unwanted underpants. Unfortunately, unlike unwanted wedding presents, they do not make ideal birthday gifts for octogenarian great aunts.

But what is more, however good they looked on the bronzed torso of the catalogue model, when you try them on the seams are uncomfortably placed; the size indication of S, M or L appears to be a wholly random designation; the original template must have been taken from an off-planet humanoid; ‘100% cotton’ means see-through and ‘polyester mixture’ means plastic bag with holes in it; and the colour-matching from the catalogue was obviously managed by a colour-blind orang-utan with a penchant for Picasso.

Which is why trying things on in a shop will always be a million times better than staring at small pictures in a book. There’s no substitute for the Real Thing.

It was GK Chesterton who remarked, not of underpants, but of Christianity: “It has not been tried and found wanting; it has not been tried.”

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Ripple at Edge of Universe

The Ripple at the Edge of the Universe…

Well who would have thought that snooker would ever be so big on television? Or darts? But now?…

…Cosmology, and any science with the prefix ‘new’ (New Physics, New Biology). They are all big on TV this year, and even bigger in the book market. Whether it’s Richard Dawkins giving the Christmas Lectures, or the psychiatrist Anthony Clare presenting Soul in three parts on BBC-2, or the new film of Stephen Hawking’s Brief History of Time, or his new biography as Editor’s Choice in The Softback Preview Stephen Hawking: A Life in Science, Viking, 1992) or even Review articles in Vanity Fair - GUTs (Grand Unified Theories) and TOEs (Theories of Everything) are here to stay. Programmes about “the new science and the mind of God” are as likely to follow Coronation Street as Match of the Day.

And many of the scientists make such sweeping claims. When they found evidence of the ripples that are the last vestiges of the Big Bang, 15,000 million years out at the edge of the universe, some announced: “We have solved the riddle of the universe.” Phooey! We may have taken further steps in confirming the current theories, but we are no nearer to answering the basic questionsof the universe, “Why did it all begin? Why are we all here? Is there meaning and purpose to be found in my life?”

But it’s all fascinating stuff, and for many of us, all the new theories serve only to re-inforce our faith and increase our sense of wonder and awe of all the Father has created through the Son.

“It is all over with priests and gods when man becomes scientific.”
How wrong could that great 19th century atheist Friedrich Nietzsche be! He proves the old adage: “he who marries the spirit of the age is sure to be a widow in the next.” Recent scientific developments have pushed the realms of science and religion closer together than they have possibly ever been. This is what makes good TV and popular books. So an American atheist like Frank Tipler claims that the theories of global relativity have driven him back to God. The major series entitled Soul, screened on BBC-2 in April, explored the spiritual implications of new scientific thinking on cosmology, evolution and brain science. There was lots of talk of ‘God’ and of the ‘Soul’ of the universe.

But we must be cautious of these scientific ‘conversions’. Newton was right when he warned, “Physics, beware metaphysics!” When many of this new breed of polymaths and metaphysicists use the word ‘god’, they do not have the personal God of the Bible in mind, or anything approaching biblical faith. “It’s only been in the last few years, understanding the implications of quantum physics and the new cosmology that I have found a way back to faith. It is a complete reinterpretation of faith, and yet one that is meaningful to the modern mind…” The Oxford mathematician, Danah Zohar, goes on to make wholly unjustified comments about Christianity “It is no longer possible to believe in both the discoveries of modern science and in the traditional dictates of the church…” (The Quantum Self, Flamingo, 1991)

“In the beginning, God…”
In fact, many of the new theories underline much of the church’s biblical teaching down through the ages. At this level, Zohar’s work raises intrigueing possibilities. She takes Fritjof Capra's classic works on the New Physics and its reinforcement of Eastern mysticism and New Age (The Tao of Physics and The Turning Point, Fontana) one stage further. Her examination of quantum theory and human consciousness provides an explanation for the subtle intermeshing of human relationships and the interplay of conscious beings with time and eternity.

Roger Penrose (The Emperor’s New Mind, Vintage, 1989) takes another similar angle to show that artificial intelligence can never match human consciousness as long as it is working on the present knowledge of mathematics and computers. A human IS more than the sum of the parts. Given a big enough computer and enough information, the human mind cannot be reproduced. Penrose is a mathematician and bases some of his arguments on a theorem of Kurt Gödel. Simply stated, this is, that for any set of rules of logic, there can be something outside of these rules which is true although these rules can never prove it to be true. So at the moment, the full workings of a human mind lie beyond computational science, outside of the physcics we presently know.

Furthermore, in this ever more bizarre universe, there is an almost unbelievable connection between the observer and the observed, sometimes expressed as the Strong Anthropic Principle. Consciousness acts as the midwife to reality. Interestingly, many scientists are arguing that quantum physics has put humankind back at the centre of the universe. As physics professor Paul Davies puts it: “It seems as though the existence of mind and consciousness in the universe is something that is in some sense meant to be… we’re not just a trivial add on to the universe, we are truly written into the script…”

So what?
You could just keep your head down and wait till the next batch of cosmological theories come along, and hope that they are more to your liking.

You can join the young earth creationists, espouse creation science and simply fit new experimental and observational details into your own version of origins and modern science. This is a lone furrow to plough, and many of us do not believe that Scripture requires it of us.

Or you can deny the theories - they are after all only theories. Remember that scientists are often wrong, but they are never unsure! Hawking and the theoreticians are certainly running ahead of observation. As Harvard’s Sidney Coleman puts it, “Are we really getting somewhere or are we running in circles? Difficult to tell, but we’re having fun. It exercises the mind.”

Worst of all, you can just push God into all the gaps again and say, “there you are - they can’t explain consciousness! That proves there’s a God!”

“The heavens declare the glory of God…”
Had the psalmist been aware of modern cosmology, he would have had even more reason to worship God. And worship is an appropriate response to all the new developments, whether they turn out to be true or just another step along the way to more convincing theories. We have nothing to fear, for it is “by faith we understand the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.” (Heb 11.3) The book writers and the programme makers give us a marvelous opportunity to point to the wonder of God, whom the Bible and our hearts reveal as the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Creator of all things.

Article - Sex and prayer

Sex And Prayer

“For the first six months of marriage men only think about sex. For the next fifty years it’s the same…” As I have just returned from Sweden, I thought it was time I dealt with sex - although there was surprisingly little of it about in Stockholm - not that I was looking. Also, this column is supposed to reflect upon how the male mind works, and most male minds work overtime on sex.

As a young man I always imagined it wouldn’t occupy your mind so much when you were old, say 35 or so. Then one of my first “pastoral situations” as a minister was helping a church member in his seventies who had been arrested for shoplifting a ‘Playboy’ from the local newsagents. It’s like the old abbot who was once asked by a young monk when he would be free from all these sexual thoughts. “About 5 minutes after you die” he replied.

All this is hardly surprising. Sexuality and spirituality are very closely related, and for men and women created in the image of God, the sex drive reflects something spiritually very deep in the Trinity. This is why many of the men and women who have pursued God so enthusiastically have been most tempted to divert their energies into the pursuit of sex - you can read about it in the diaries of the saints down through the ages. Perhaps men think a lot about sex because they don’t dare think about the God who created it.

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - I did it my way

I DID IT MY WAY…

I’ve been doing some assertiveness training recently. (A friend told me I needed that about as much as a lion needs roaring lessons…) For some people this is a major step towards accepting their self-worth; towards abandoning a “pardon-me-for-living” frame of mind; towards living like a king, even when you are a pauper. (That’s what Robin Williams is about in the film The Fisher King.) At its worst, this is a method for making sure you always get your own way!

Here’s a common example. “Waiter! I know its not your fault, but this chicken is tough and dry. It’s been overcooked. Please bring me another meal.” Everyone else on the table at a friend’s birthday party was embarrassed. They would have complained to each other (when the birthday boy had gone, of course) but never to the waiter. One just doesn’t ‘make a scene’.

There was no ‘scene’. It was all very calm and we got an apology, a nice piece of chicken and deserts on the house.

I saw outside a church the other day: “The Meek shall inherit the earth” and someone had added underneath: “If that’s alright with you?” Some Christians really do have this false idea of meekness - “I’m just a doormat for the Lord.” It was precisely because Jesus was assertively in control of his own life, that he could display true meekness in laying down that life for others. Jesus lived like a king although he was a pauper: “Meekness and majesty, in perfect harmony.”

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Why worry?

Why Worry?

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” (Matthew 6.33)

It is said that, even as the great ‘unsinkable’ Titanic was beginning to list and sink after hitting the iceberg, stewards were busying themselves on the sun-deck putting the chairs in neat rows. I suppose we all get our priorities wrong at times. Jesus knew that this was a universal weakness, not least among the people of God. He talks about it on a number of occasions, including here in the Sermon on the Mount.

We are going to look at the Christian's Concern - what are our priorities? Then at God's concern - his providential care of us.

The first thing to notice about this verse is the word 'but'. This links us with all that Jesus has been saying before about worry and anxiety. The chief concern of the Gentile, or in our world, of the non-Christian, is to seek after the material things of life - food, drink, clothing. Not that Jesus is here condemning starving men looking for food, or reasonable care for our needs. But he's condemning those who have the basics of life, who yet are preoccupied with material things. They fret and worry about the everyday things of life; about the secondary.

We all know those people who can go on and on and on about the price of milk, or their dog’s sleeping habits, or the weather… The non-Christian is often preoccupied with these secondary matters of living. His chief concern is continually to seek after these things, says Jesus in v.32. But that is not to be the Christian's chief concern. He is not to become worried and anxious about the things of today, or even, says Jesus in v. 34, about the things that might happen tomorrow. For although worry is not one of the greatest of sins, it is one of the most disabling.

The Christian who is always anxious about this and that, is never going to know the peace, and joy, and fruitful living which Jesus wishes for his disciples. Jesus doesn't want us to worry, but he doesn’t just say: "Don't worry!" We all know that that does no good at all. Like the man who said “I pay a man a thousand pounds a year to worry for me.” “How can you afford that?” his friend asks. “I can’t, but that’s his worry!”

Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones sees Jesus' sense of humour coming out in our text. He paraphrases these few verses like this: "If you're not happy unless you have something to worry about, then worry about the Kingdom of God! That's what you should be preoccupied with!" This is the Christian's chief concern; to seek his kingdom - the kingdom of God - and his righteousness. But what does this phrase mean? The kingdom of God is God reigning as King in our lives - it's not an area, or a group of people - it's God's will being worked out in us. And we're not just concerned that God should rule our lives, but that he should become King also in the lives of other men and women. We pray that God’s kingdom should come and his will be done on earth as it is in heaven; that God's standards of holiness and righteousness be established in the world.

Here’s another way of filling out the meaning behind the words in this verse: “we are to seek continually (for that is the meaning of the verb here) to be, first and foremost, ruled by Christ, like Christ, and longing to see Christ as Lord in the lives of others. This is the Christian's chief concern.”

We'd all say 'Amen!' to that. But we don't do it!! How often in our own lives or in our church life, we know what our Christian priorities are, and yet we put other things first!

Jesus knew, that for the rule of God to be evident in his life with power, he needed to spend time talking with God. So often we find our Lord up early in the morning, praying to God his Father. We know that if we are to be ruled by Christ and grow more like him, then everyday we need to spend time feeding on his Word, worshipping him, praying for others, praying for ourselves. And yet we let the worries of everyday living divert us from this, or reduce it to the little more than a token gesture. The mother, the student, the working man - we're all busy. But the man who is too busy to pray is too busy. Even if we cannot manage extended periods of prayer, we can all ‘practice the presence of God’. We need to get this priority straight in our minds and govern our days, our lives, by it.

In a few weeks time, many of my students will be sitting exams. In the days and months leading up to these, much of life becomes dominated by the very real priority of passing them. Shall we go and have coffee? No! We must work! Can we take this meeting? No! We've got exams! Shall we play croquet? How can we when we can't remember whether Arius was at the Council of Nicaea or Chalcedon! It becomes, in some respects, the students’ main concern, and they do everything else in the light of it.

So in our church life we must look at all our activities and meetings, our work in the local community, and ask: ‘Is this establishing the rule of Christ, making us a holy people, bringing others into the kingdom? Or is it simply diverting us from our priority, absorbing our time and manpower, while encouraging us to believe we're about the Lord's work, when really it's our own work?’

But what is God’s part in all this? ‘... and all these things shall be yours as well’ - this is God's concern: to take care of our everyday needs; to enable us to cope with the busyness of our daily lives.

CH Spurgeon preached on this text to the London Banks' Prayer Union in 1885 in the Mansion House. He illustrated this point by telling of a certain merchant who was requested by Elizabeth I to go abroad on affairs of state. He pleaded that his own business would suffer as a result, whereupon the Queen replied: "Sir, if you will mind my business, I will mind your business." If we concern ourselves with the work of God, he will concern himself with our daily work.

But it is important to note that God does not see to our needs because we put his kingdom first, as a reward. He never works in this way, for he only gives and cares because of his grace; because he is love. Jesus mentions the wealth of Solomon in v.29 Why was he so rich? Because he sought riches? No! He sought what was the most important thing for a king: discernment and the wisdom of God. We may never be rich, but when we put the things of God first, then we put ourselves in a position where he can work out the very best for our lives. When this chief concern of ours is right, then we need have no anxiety about these other matters, for we can then appreciate that we are God's concern. Sadly, we often only prove this to be true in crisis situations - when our own resources fail.

So then, is it clear to you what your priorities are? Has God shown you from his Word how you are to be ruled by Christ and more like Christ? Then make this your chief concern. Let it dominate your planning and thinking each day.

Or are you anxious about the circumstances of your life; worried about the future? Then get your priorities straight, however pressing other things appear to be, and you will increasingly realise, sometimes despite the circumstances, that you are God's concern. He cares for you.

Prayer
Lord Jesus, you set your face like a flint towards Jerusalem; you pursued the cross for love of me. And your Father raised you up to glory. Help me to pursue your kingdom, whatever the cost. And help me to trust that my Father will give me all the other things I need along the road to glory. For the honour of Jesus and his church. Amen.

For the Christian Herald

Article - It's for you-oo

IT’S FOR YOU-OO!

“I’ll get it!” My mother never missed an opportunity to answer the phone. She had a curious ‘telephone voice’ which I think she must have picked up from those old Pinewood films in which everyone spoke the most frightfully decent English.

In the 50’s we had the only telephone in my street - dad was President of the First Class Operators’ Club (Radio Hams), which meant he looked after a phone and a very inky duplicator - and my mother would always listen to all business transacted on our black bakelite miracle, with a bell like a fire-engine. George had dumped Liz. Liz was on the phone in tears. Nicky was despatched to get George. Mother positioned herself in good earshot behind the kitchen door. Births, deaths, break-ups were all recorded on the phone in our hall, and then thrown open for discussion by the household and any passing neighbours.

Life without a phone is unimaginable for me. I can’t resist them and have a gallimaufry of 8 scattered around the flat and office. And I meddle endlessly with the captivatingly complicated College system with 7 lines and 48 extensions…

Occasionally I will have a ‘fast day’ from the phone and sit nervously while it rings, telling myself I will not let it rule over me! But mostly I’m helpless with curiosity. Would I were so enthusiastic to listen to God - He’s only a Call away on the Divine Helpline (Jeremiah 333): “Call to me and I will answer you …” And he’s always for you-oo.

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - A Rose by any other scent

A Rose By Any Other Scent

Horses sweat; men perspire; and ladies glow. I don’t wear deodorants myself, which means I have shelves full of the stuff that friends kindly contribute at festive occasions - maybe they are trying to tell me something? My rippling muscles obviously don’t produce as much stale odour as those bronzed torsos in the ads with the beautiful women draped round them.

But I do wear aftershave. I love all those ‘scratch & sniff’ adverts. (I wonder when they will do them for food or disinfectants?) Often, on my way to a meeting or a show in Town, I pop into a department store and generously apply the free sample to my face - not my wrists - it has to last me all evening!

Of course they call it “aftershave” because that sounds more rugged and manly than “perfume for men”. A rose by any other name. It can’t be long now till the business executive jokes with the air hostess: “and I’d better take some perfume home for the husband…”

It has other uses as well. I can ‘scents’ which students have been in my flat while I’ve been out, especially those guys who use it to freshen up clothes they’ve already retrieved from the dirty washing twice. And a dash in a bland cooking oil transforms it into an inexpensive massage oil…

What a pity many men are more concerned with their bodily fragrance than with the aroma of their personality - you can’t just splash on ‘love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control’. You have to sweat at these!

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Sons and mothers

SONS & MOTHERS

My mother may have been a lot of things, but she was never wrong! As
my three sisters were also never wrong, and neither was my resident Gran (mum's mum), our little terraced house was unusually loud. Dad, I and my three brothers learned the art of diplomacy and 'What Is Important' in that charged atmosphere.

Mum is dead now. She died 10 years ago of cancer after a long period of wasting away. In the last days I picked her up like a little child and carried her away from hospital so she could die at home in her own bed where most of my brothers and sisters were conceived and born.

The loss was insistent for the first few years. I would keep thinking, “I must remember to tell mum that.” We were poor and so she always took great interest in how the other half lived. I wrote home every week from Cambridge. Had I been to the Vice Chancellor's for tea? That was nice. So what sort of bathroom did he have? Even now I find myself standing at the toilet in Someone Important's house, making mental notes about whether the tiles are real or just pretend wallpaper. Mother made me a diligent observer of all life.

Women in their own right have had a profound effect on the world
as influential leaders - such was Mrs Thatcher. But many mothers who play no part in public life have nonetheless greatly influenced world affairs in small and great ways through the shaping of the minds of their sons and daughters.

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Amantes sunt Amentes

AMANTES SUNT AMENTES
(Lovers are Lunatics)

Most - no, to be honest, all of my Valentine cards got lost in the post last year. In fact the only two cards I ever remember receiving carried depressing messages: “Every time I see you Dearie, I can believe in Darwin’s Theory.” And then on the Leap Year in ‘88: “You are the answer to a maiden’s prayer. Not exactly what I prayed for; but apparently the answer…”

Men, in general, only send cards to women who would brain them or withdraw their services if a card were not forthcoming. On the other hand, a lot of romantic women send a lot of cards to a very select group of men. And I am obviously not one of those Overchosen Few. (Although I am slightly more encouraged by the statistic that half the people married in Britain last year were men…) So I have to read the cards on my friends’ shelves.

Most of them carry those slushy, rose-petalled messages that make you feel that the sender is several bricks short of a load. But then even sensible men I know seem to do silly things when they are in love; sometimes even unwise things.

Wasn’t it Publilius Syrus who said amare et sapere vix deo conceditur (“even a god finds it hard to love and be wise at the same time”)? Good Friday reminds us that our God found it infinitely costly to love and be wise at the same time.

Woman Alive monthly column

Article - Men's Lib

MEN’S LIB

Do I really want to wear an aftershave called “Savage” I ask myself? Well, I suppose it’s more fragrant than “Scrum Down” which smells a bit like the Lost Property box in the school changing room. But this is all part of the revival of Wild Warrior Man - a newish movement in the States to promote male awareness amongst men; a backlash to Women’s Lib and the New Feminist Man who is tender, changes nappies and loves quiche.

I was on the West Coast of the States again in the summer and was urged to find my Wild Self. (I must have misplaced it while singing sloppy choruses in my teens…) Real Men, apparently, pay large sums of money to go on weekends with their adolescent sons and other Warriors. They fight and smell each other’s sweat and do lots of male-bonding and hugging. Now I admit I’m a hugger - although I was very disappointed recently when I picked up a copy of “How to Hug” and found it was Volume IV of an expansive dictionary… And I enjoy rugger, squash and beating up men who are smaller than me. But the Wild Warrior? Is this really what manliness is about?

If I think about the 24 single men who share my house: some strong and macho, some weak and whimpy, not a few savages and all caring and colourful (form an orderly queue please…) Then what makes all these truly “Liberated Men”, is that Christ has set them free.

Woman Alive monthly column